Wow, it has been a long time. I had almost forgotten that I had a blog. I think this stems from several factors. First, I have been ridiculously busy with 247+Cadre, and second I did not have a subject to write on. Without that I feel lost and unfocused and I am unable to desire writing enough to actually write a blog consistently. So, here I am writing (again, without a subject) because I am bored. Bored writing is no writing as I always say (I made that up just now).

Upon awakening this morning I was greeted by the sight of a very large nose. This belonged to my dog, Xander. Xander, despite not obeying much of anything we tell him, is very good at waking people up. We just have him follow us to the room of the person we desire woken, and then tell him to "Go get him..." or "Stick your nose in his face..." or "Lick him Xander..." or "Jump on him..." or "Bite him..." or any of a thousand other wordings. At that point he will walk over to the bed being pointed to and stick his nose into the face of the person in question. This morning that person was me. If he is petted he will stay nearby and let you continue, if not petted he will turn to look at the person who issued the order and then, if he receives encouragement he will continue, if they are not there he will leave to follow them some more. Then I went shopping with my family and got some socks and running shoes, came home and wrote this blog. What a great day. ^_^

Hardness

Adding 'ness onto the end of a word makes it better. It is also much more fun to say. Hard is the root word here. Ness is just added for effect and funness. There it is again. So anyhow. Hard. Thats what Eco-Challenge was. I won't get into too many details so as not to spoil christmas for any of my friends back home who might read this and do 24/7 later. For me, it was harder than Ironman, which was the hardest thing I have ever done. The fact that it was two days was a big part of that. The good thing about it though, was the lessons that I learned.

Self reliance is out. Pandiculated, uneccesary, useless, harmful even. I CANNOT do it on my own. I thought that I had a grasp of that concept, I was wrong. I have a much better grasp now. I now see much more clearly in a certain way that I truly, truly cannot do anything on my own. I might struggle along for a little while and do ok, but it will not last. No sir. 

I must lead. I am a little saddened that I did not step up and lead as much as I could have. I let myself take a back seat and let Zach and Angie lead the most. Monica stepped up in a phenomenal way (Phenomenal is my new favorite word btw.) The problem is I feel like I should have stepped up and done what Monica did. Instead I let myself focus more on myself and my pain and I let myself get into my flesh for long periods of time. Angie talked to me once and told me to step up and lead like she knew I could and should. I listened but I didn't really do it. A little bit, but not much. I wish I had done more. The positive side is that I learned that lesson anyways, just in a different way than I should have. I realized what happens when somebody doesn't step up and lead. I am not saying we didn't do well, we did a phenomenal job. I personally let myself down though because I know God wanted me to be a leader in that situation. I know he wanted me to step out and encourage. To show everyone, Aurora especially, that even when it is extremely hard you can step up and push yourself and everyone else. I wish I had. The plus is that I saw it afterwards and I will be able to improve in the future.

I am nothing and the worst of sinners. Pride is a bad thing. Pride gets in the way. Pride beats us down and keeps us down. I learned that I cannot have pride and push myself past my limits. Why? Because I need others to help me get past my limits and when I am being prideful I won't let others help me. When we were doing the biking I struggled with the pride. I am a biker, I love biking. I mountain biked for a year and got myself into good shape, particularly for biking. Then I didn't hardly get on my bike for almost 4 years and I lost all biking muscle in my legs. So, that put me in a place where I am a good biker, very comfortable on a bike, but not as strong as I have been, so I had some trouble with the uphills. Well, my pride rose up during that when people would be encouraging me just like they were encouraging Aurora (who is a terrible biker, no offence intended). I wanted them to leave me alone because I was a good biker, I was experienced, I knew how to ride a bike, I could control it, I could get up those hills. I realized that I was being prideful. I realized that I am not that good of a biker if I have a hard time getting up those little hills we had. Could I have stayed on the bike the entire time and not walked up a hill? Maybe, with difficulty, but certainly not without encouragement. Even when I felt like I didn't need it, I did. It helped even when I didn't think it did, particularly once I realized that I was being prideful. 

I am a slow walker. I don't know what it is about me but I walk slower than everyone else. I am able to walk fast for a short period of time but keeping up that pace is pretty much not possible on my own. It feels like I am practically running and I hate it. I am hoping that as I run this summer and improve in that I will be getting better at walking. Oh well. I also learned that I hate hiking at a forced pace. I like pleasure hiking where I can take my time. 

So, thats a few of the things that I learned through Eco. I am going to be honest with all of you: I will probably not blog about my trip to Kenya. Everyone always says they will get around to it but they wanted to get this post out of the way first. Well, I highly doubt that I will come back and blog about Africa. Sorry. I will, however, post some images on photobucket or some such website and then post the link here. Farewell for now.

Josiah

So, I went and read the story of Josiah in both 2 Kings and 2 Chronicles. I got several revelations that I think I needed from it but I don't have time to share it all right now and I am not sure that I want to do it here. Anyhow. 2 Chronicles 34:1-3

Josiah was eight years old when he became king, and he reigned thirty-one years in Jerusalem.
And he did what was right in the sight of the LORD, and walked in the ways of his father David; he did not turn aside to the right hand or to the left.
For in the eighth year of his reign, while he was still young, he began to seek the God of his father David; and in the twelfth year he began to purge Judah and Jerusalem of the high places, the wooden images, the carved images, and the molded images.

Since Josiah was 8 when he became king that makes him 16 when he began to seek God and 20 when he purged Judah and Jerusalem. I found some interesting and cool things about the hebrew word for 'seek' that is used here. I'll blog about that later. For the moment I want to focus on the three things that I saw in this passage.

I really can identify myself in this. The first thing that is said about him is that he did what was right. The placement of this in the verse makes me think that it doesn't mean that he was good "all-in-all" if you look at his whole lifespan. It says to me that he did what was right to God while he was young. It was not until he was 16 that he began to actually seek God though. That is the second thing that I got. The third is that he began to purge the cities and villages of the idols and such that had grown up there.

This relates to me and my life in almost every way. I grew up in church with a faith. I followed the rules, I did it right (for the most part...). Then eventually I turned to God and I started seeking him. At first that went well. I learned alot. 24/7 is a part of this stage and it really is a good stage. The next stage is harder for most everyone. It is the stage where I was shown a small piece of what is wrong with my life. In my meditating and praying over this I see Josiah and Judah as me. My life has been full of idols like the poles and such that were up. I felt convicted to tear down those idols and the things that I have been placing before Christ. So. That is all because I am falling asleep. 

To be Continued...

I'll probably get into seeking a little next blog. I have some good stuff (I think so anyways)

Rewrites and the Tale of Two Cocoons

Ok, well I want to post something right now even though it may not be the best time or the wisest choice. I have had all sorts of things running through my head that I wanted to study and get into and eventually put down here. I don't have time obviously, because its 12:30 AM and I need sleep. For the last hour and a half I have been doing rewrites because I didn't do them earlier. I didn't do them earlier because I forgot that I had them. I forgot that I had them because that is only the second scripture memory that I have ever failed and I am not used to doing rewrites. So anyways. Talk about distractions. Not only was I getting distracted like crazy but as it got later and later I began to fall asleep. Not for long, only like 20 seconds to 2 minutes but I would just write for a minute and then I would snap my eyes open and start writing again. It sucked. I still have one more to write too. Sigh... Oh Well. The question is, did I fail because I didn't study or did God intend for me to fail so that I could get a much better grasp on this verse for the future?

So, one thing really quick that I have been bouncing around and that I don't need to meditate on and research more before I write it here is a quick analogy that I got during our prayer for Real Life. I don't really know if it is a tale but that sounded cool. It started when I was praying against sexual sins and pornography in particular. I thought of an illustration I saw (at the encounter retreat). In it a guy had a single piece of yarn wrapped around his wrists. He broke it easily. Then the second time he went back it was two pieces of yarn and he broke it easily again. The third time it was four pieces. Then he had some difficulty breaking it but he did. Then the fourth time he had a whole bunch more and he was unable to break it. Soon he was in strong bondage and wrapped tightly in the rope. It simply symbolizes how the sin entangles us more strongly the more we do it.

We are like that. It particularly pertains to sexual sins but it also works with all other sins to an extent. They all combine, all of them as a single, easy rope that we can break but as we go back over and over they grow. Soon we are wrapped in ropes and unable to move and eventually it becomes an entire cocoon. If we stay there we will change from the christians we started as into something dark and dirty. Something that smells foul and produces no good fruit. I believe that we can lose our salvation if we stay in that cocoon for too long. But there is hope. When we cry out to Jesus he is there to save us. He rescues us from that cocoon we were in. He breaks it open so we can crawl out. Once we have been set free everything is not perfect though. We still are crippled and baby christians. That is when we should begin to surround ourselves with Godly things and things that will challenge us to grow. We should read the bible, surround ourselves with Godly friends and accountability, and begin to work and pray in the spirit. As we do those things we begin to weave a new web of super light threads around us. They are very easy to break out of. But, as we wrap ourselves tighter and tighter in these things we begin to be transformed. Our minds are renewed and we are changed from glory to glory. In the end we emerge from this new cocoon as a beautiful butterfly, free to soar the skies and live in the freedom God designed us for. Then people will see us and wonder what it would be like to be a butterfly. We won't even have to speak because the testimony of our lives will be so powerful. 

I want to be in that second cocoon. I want to be a butterfly. I want to be a person that brings joy to people around me without even having to say anything. I want to soar with the freedom that God wants me to have. The freedom to fly where the spirit nudges me without being hindered by any ropes that try to hold me down. 

Words.

pinchbeck \PINCH-bek\, noun, adjective:
1. an alloy of zinc and copper used to imitate gold in jewelry-making; by extension, something counterfeit; an imitation 
2. not genuine; fake

I love words. Words are Powerful. Words are Meaningful. There are so many words in the english language that I have never heard of. So many words that I am clueless about. At the same time there are so many words that I am able to guess the meaning of, either because I know the root words or because I see the context. I just found the word Pandiculation and I think it is awesome!

pandiculation \pan-dik-yuh-LEY-shuhn\, noun:
an instinctive stretching, as on awakening or while yawning

So the next time you are about to stretch and yawn make sure you mention to the people around you that you intend to Pandiculate. Just imagine what a great conversation starter that could be.

"Excuse me sir, but that was an excellent Pandiculation you just performed. It looked thoroughly invigorating." I am at a loss as to what a person would reply to that because I have yet to say it to anyone. It is also good to note that the larger your vocabulary the smarter people think you are. Especially if you actually know the definitions of the big words you are using. It is an instant "Smart Person" tag on you.

Words mean so much. Words in Hebrew seem to mean so much more. I have been looking at original translations of Hebrew and Greek words in the bible lately and it seems to me like the Hebrew words mean so much more. For instance, in Genesis 4:25 it says that "Adam had Relations with his wife again;". I've been reading on www.searchgodsword.org/isb/ and looking at what the different words mean in their original translations. According to the website the word Relations used here and elsewhere in the bible is translated as a great number of different things in the New American Standard Bible. Here is a list of less than half of the times that word is in the bible and the different words that they use in english for it as well as how many times it is used for that word:

ability, 1; acknowledge, 4; acknowledged, 2; acquaintances, 5; acquainted, 1; aware, 6; becomes known, 1; bring forth, 1; cared, 1; chosen, 2; clearly understand, 2; cohabit, 1; comprehend, 1; concern, 2; concerned, 1; consider, 3; declare, 1; detected, 1; directed, 1; discern, 2; disciplined, 1; discovered, 3; distinguish, 1; endowed, 3; experienced, 4; experiences, 1; familiar friend, 1; find, 5; found, 1; gain, 1; had knowledge, 1; had relations, 6; had...relations, 1; has, 1; has regard, 1; has...knowledge, 1; have, 4; have relations, 3; have...knowledge, 2; ignorant, 1; illiterate

Now, I firmly believe that God is/was behind the translations of the bible that we read and that he can use them all for his purposes. But, I look at that and I don't know if it is a good thing or if it is a bad thing. The KJV only has 15 different english uses for the word. I counted approximately 109 in the NAS. What do you do with something like that?

I think we should definitely read the Word with that knowledge. When we come across something that we aren't sure of, or something that we really want to dig deeper into to get a better picture of, or when God is pointing something out to us, then we need to take a look at the deeper word used. God designed the entire bible to convey the message he wants to convey. Sometimes it is easier to see that message if we look into the words used. Every single one was planned out, Hebrew or English. I believe that reading into it and discovering what the original is and what the english means is one of God's great mysteries that he wants us to search out and discover. So, look some words up, find some cool new ones and discover new revelations in God's word. 

Hebrews and Valentines

This is my first Blog Post! I do remember telling myself a few years ago that I did not ever want a blog because that was dumb. Well here I am and I want a blog. Oh how we change. I want one now but I am not sure how much I will really like it. It might be an impulse thing for me. So I apologize if you start to read this and I only end up posting like 3 times.

Anyways. I want to throw out the meaning of the little thingy under the title of my blog for you to understand a little. It comes from Hebrews 11:32-34, as you see there. Here is the verse:

And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel and the prophets, who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies.

I think it is an awesome verse. It fires me up. I don't want to be the guy living the life he always wanted. I want to be the guy living the life God always wanted for me through faith in his promises. That means it will be a hard life, but, God will use me to do things like that. Conquer Kingdoms, shut the mouths of lions, become powerful in battle and route foreign armies. I want my weakness to be turned into strength. 

So, yea. Thats all the good stuff I have right now. Daily things now.

This evening we put on a valentines day party thing for the single girls of 24/7. We guys just wanted to show them that we love them and we respect them and...yea, somthing like that. Anyhow, my part was to sing a song. It was so hard to pick the song but I finally found one I liked. Somewhere Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole. It went well and everyone liked it. It was definitely difficult to accept all the compliments because I am not, in any way, used to getting complimented much. It was definitely worth it though. I had fun and I am glad everyone enjoyed it. I thank God for the voice he gave me less often than I should. 

Anyhow, thats all I want to write. I really would like this blog to be a sort of update on myself for any family and friends back home who want to keep up with me a little and I want it to be a place where I can share some of the things I am learning and that God is showing and teaching me. So, if it gets long and preachy I apologize. I'll try to keep it relatively interesting and relavant. Being something of an amateur photographer I'll probably be putting pictures on to show off the ones I like. Thats All. Congratulations on making it to the end ^_^